This photo makes me laugh every time I look at it. I think it’s because I simply cannot adequately describe the cat’s expression in my mind. He looks like he wants to be pissed and yet he’s waiting to see what the guys will think….
Before I launch into the description of my pet peeve I must say a few things. It struck me as I opened this page and thought about what I was going to write that all I ever seem to talk about is silly, mundane, day-to-day nonsense that is of no benefit or indeed consequence to the world at large. When I combined this realization with the fact that I was about to compound my superficiality by bleating about my personal pet peeve, well, I was somewhat ashamed.
It was at that point that I recalled that my brother is the author of one of the more intellectually stimulating, contemporary, and open-minded blogs on this site (Doug’s Darkworld). With this in mind I decided (rationalized) that since he has all the important stuff covered, I should be free to babble on to my heart’s content. There’s nothing I can say about the state of the world that he hasn’t said or won’t say in the future. Plus, he is much more intelligent than I, so I’m not even going to embarrass myself by trying.
I’m afraid to even leave a comment on his blog for fear of looking like an idiot. For instance, I read his blog today about gun control, and what’s going on in the middle east, etc, etc. But do you want to know what I found the most interesting thing about the blog? He began a paragraph with the sentence ’snort’. That was it – one word, ’snort’. I laughed for five minutes over that one – puts ‘jesus wept’ to shame.
Moving along I simply must expound upon my pet peeve. Perhaps by exposing it to the light of day it will cease and desist its unending torture of me. Picture this: I’m in bed, I’m reading a novel, I become sleepy, I reach over and grab my bookmark to save my place for the next evening. What bookmark? There’s no bookmark. It’s certainly not on the pillow next to me where I carefully placed it (in an attempt to foil the bookmark Gods), it’s not on my bedside table, it’s not on my chest, and it’s not on the blankets next to me. I feel the sleepiness I had cultivated with a hour’s reading slowly dissolve into a fit of rage. Up come the sheets, the blankets, the pillow is thrown thither, the book yon, and then suddenly the bookmark is there. Innocently resting upon the bed as if it had been there all along. This, dear friends, is my pet peeve.
I was at work the other day speaking to a co-worker about another co-worker, and she said, “he’s about as useless as two tits in a bowl”. To which I replied rather facetiously, “yes, and almost as useless as two tits on a bull”. Well, she stopped dead in her tracks and looked at me like I had turned lead into gold. “What did you say?” she asked, and I repeated myself. “My God”, she said, “is that the saying? My Mum has been saying that to me for 30 years and I always thought she was saying ‘two tits in a bowl’ and I could never figure out what she meant!!!”
“Mystery solved!” I replied, and told her that the actual saying is “useless as tits on a bull”. And with that little epiphany behind her, we went on to agree that he is useless no matter how you describe it!
