I wanted to write this before the day is over. It is 11:50pm where I am writing this on Sept. 10th, 2007. Well, actually now it’s 11:51pm. Anyways, I just wanted to mark this special occasion for myself. This has been one of the worst days of my life. One of the most life-changing to be sure. My life could have gone down two very divergent roads today (and let’s not get into a metaphysical argument about that – let’s just assume I’m not being completely literal). My life did go down one of the roads. Unfortunately, it appears to be the dark and scary road. I don’t want to get into the specifics of what happened because then I would feel even worse – seeing it in black and white.
Sometimes I just don’t know how one even goes on when one feels this terrible. But I shan’t be selfish forever – many people have felt much worse. I just don’t think God or whomever should give us things and then take them away. I should take ownership of the loss but I don’t.
I’m still in the dazed and confused stage.
